Author Topic: [Open Ending] The Enemy Is Your Worst Nightmare (966 Words)  (Read 95 times)

Offline Void

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[Open Ending] The Enemy Is Your Worst Nightmare (966 Words)
« on: March 13, 2021, 10:24:06 PM »
The soldiers and Lt. Dove, though weary, marched solemnly towards their destined battleground, a small, decrepit outpost, bordering the two camps. The soldiers, on their own two feet, were  traversing a forest that lays a few kilometres from the outpost. A forest was perfect for a remaining hidden while resting.
Lt. Dove, commander of this company suddenly stopped and signalled his company of soldiers to stop marching, lest they’ll be discovered by enemy’s scouts. Lt. Dove turned around and then takes a good look at all of his soldiers- _nay_ brothers, solemnly. He saw the exhaustion, the fear, the determination from his company. The soldiers, drenched in sweats, still standing tall, not moving even a single muscle as they waited for Lt. Dove’s next command.
“At ease” the Lieutenant commanded his men. The tense and tired face of the soldiers, quickly relaxed but they were still in perfect formation. The lieutenant then, takes a deep breath and said,
“You all have marched from Valiant Base with tenacity and discipline, and for that I am very proud of you guys. But that’s enough for today, after this, make camp, have some dinner and go to rest. We will have a big day, tomorrow. We will need sufficient rest, if we are to drive these monsters out of this land, that our fathers, desperately fought for. Their turn had brought us freedom, now its our turn to do so, for our children and theirs. We will be on the move again before the first light, That’s all from me. FALL OUT! “ Lt. Dove gave his order.
The soldiers nodded in silence as to not alert the enemy camp and unpacking the heavy bags on their shoulders. Some were laying out sleeping bags, some preparing dinner, filling up water tanks, digging holes for when nature calls, a few of them spread out and kept watch as lookout while there are men who are pitching a tent for Lt. Dove. The evening were tranquil and quiet, like the calm before a storm. The soldiers ate their dinner without any hullabaloo and went to rest for the moments that’s approaching. Night sentries changed every hour so that all men got their rest.
The moon was dim that night as if it were to mourn the soldiers on both sides that’ll become sacrifices in the incoming fight. Even the wind blow slowly, the whistles reminisce of a eulogy for the fallen. Night haven’t ended when the soldiers began to wake and began to dress. Like the evening before, all done with minimal sounds and high efficiency. Lt. Dove went out of his tent and waited for his men.
“Ten-Hut ! Men! Fall in! “ he commandeered, with nary a smile on his square face. The soldiers quickly left their businesses and fell into position.
“Listen up men, this is a battle we can’t avoid. This battle can possibly be the key that’ll help us win the war. No matter, what your religion or faith is, pray to your Gods, for today we need all the miracle and luck we can get.” Lt. Dove began his pre-battle talk.” I cannot assure that all of you will make it out alive today, or even walk with all limbs still attached, but I can assure you that if you follow my commands with a willing heart and trusts in our brothers, we will be victorious. Look to your left and right. These are your brothers that have gone through many a battles with you, many of our brothers and sisters have gone ahead of us, but their will were inherited by us, their bodies may have returned to the earth, but their souls still roaring with pride, never extinguished. I won’t tell you to be brave, because that’ll be hypocrisy.” Lt Dove could see that some of his men were sweating and had pale faces, others had looks of uncertainty.
“I know, that all of you are afraid of this incoming battle, even I not sure if I’ll survive this battle. Yes, even I am afraid. Afraid that I’ll lose all of you, afraid of dying, afraid that our failure here will doom our brothers and sisters, who are incapable of resisting these abominations. But it’s what we have to do. It is our duty, our sworn oath to protect all that is dearest to us. There’s no use cowering before battle, we will never know what’ll happens unless we’ve tried it. Now, let’s turn the dye this forest red.” The speech from the lieutenant ignited the spirits of his soldiers, Blazing flames of determination could be seen in their eyes.
“Some of you may know the history of this place, others may not, This exact place you and I are standing on right now is right where our two sides first initiated contact and clashed. The monsters crept here slowly and ambushed our scout units, some who survived the initial attack, requested for reinforcement, whom the outpost quickly deployed. Struggled and fought fiercely as they might, They did not win that battle.” The lieutenant, stopped to take a deep breath, his eyes glistened, under the dim lighting of mini flashlights.
“The outpost was captured, and that’s the beginning of our nightmares. The scout that fired the flare was none other than my own Gramps. He survived the battles but lost almost all those he loved. The failure of that battle haunted him right to his death bed. The shame he felt for surviving while others had not, killed him. I, as his grandson shall end this debt between those monsters and my Gramps. Today, we shall avenge our predecessor, our fallen brothers and sisters and end what they had sacrificed their lives for!” The lieutenant roared with madness, clearly seen in his eyes.

Offline Skald--of--jorvik

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Re: [Open Ending] The Enemy Is Your Worst Nightmare (966 Words)
« Reply #1 on: March 14, 2021, 10:43:42 AM »
I think you've done a very good job of capturing the tense yet monotonous wait before the battle with the description of the jobs the soldiers are doing contrasted with the quiet anxiety. I like your choice of name for Lt Dove, as doves are considered symbols of peace, I thought that was an interesting touch.

Some of the language is quite vague, its never clear who, where or even when this battle is taking place, other than its near a forest, I would have enjoyed the language to provide a  little more specific context as to when/where/who was involved, but that's just my personal preference.
 
The whole of life is just like watching a film. Only it’s as though you always get in ten minutes after the big picture has started, and no-one will tell you the plot, so you have to work it out all yourself from the clues- Terry Pratchett

Offline Void

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Re: [Open Ending] The Enemy Is Your Worst Nightmare (966 Words)
« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2021, 12:23:55 PM »
I think you've done a very good job of capturing the tense yet monotonous wait before the battle with the description of the jobs the soldiers are doing contrasted with the quiet anxiety. I like your choice of name for Lt Dove, as doves are considered symbols of peace, I thought that was an interesting touch.

Some of the language is quite vague, its never clear who, where or even when this battle is taking place, other than its near a forest, I would have enjoyed the language to provide a  little more specific context as to when/where/who was involved, but that's just my personal preference.

 Heyo, Skald--of--jorvik, Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, I intentionally left it a little vague because this story written with another meaning. Can you figure it out? Hint : It's in the Title. Btw, Thanks for reading this story.
« Last Edit: March 15, 2021, 11:24:12 PM by Void »