The Tented City

[Nora]

Hi. I would very much appreciate some specific feedback on this poem. Thanks so much!

The Tented City, a 2-part poem using the first line from The Golden Shovel by Terrance Hayes, Part II “1991”: Into the tented city we go

I. Fun

Into the tented city we go
Not knowing what we might find
Hoping for something special
Unique
Unusual
In the urban fabric landscape
With nowhere to charge devices
Maybe: finding kids
Suddenly without all their screens
Playing invented games that never existed before that moment

II. Defiance

Into the tented city we go
Finding an unhoused city
A city of people living in tents
Who are not “camping out”
Who cannot go back
To warm dry homes
Made of brick
Or wood
Or stone
Who yet and still
Clap and shout
Dance and sing
To remind us that
They are here
They are with us
They are alive
They are human

[Cliff Sombito]

This poem reminds me of nomads, their home is where their feet take them. It tells of simple living without the influence of modern technologies. It's a nice poem. Thank you for sharing.

[Nora]

Thanks Cliff. I had not even thought of that aspect of a "tented city." I guess there is always that possibility, that anything one writes could ring a different bell for someone else. I'll keep it in mind as a good suggestion for a different take on this poem.