Author Topic: ‘That’s my Star’  (Read 277 times)

Offline Lori_g

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‘That’s my Star’
« on: June 18, 2019, 08:29:29 AM »
‘That’s my star’

I made a wise choice picking you that day,
I made a connection, one that’d stay.
Emphatic, deep rooted, kept me tethered lifelong,
Through s**t and through weddings, the voice to my song.

For a time, your riches were lush,
and extremities a rush.
But your leash grew weak;
enemies began to creep.
The drip line was fraying, spiralling, fading...”Oh s***, are we done....?”
You grabbed on and said; “no, you **** , we’ve just f*****g begun!”.

I turned and found the army - it was strong,
it was sleek, it was freak; it was there all along.
All standing for you - the best view!
And instead of announcing “I’m God, bow down little you”,
You opened your door and said “come on through”.
« Last Edit: June 18, 2019, 09:37:12 AM by Lori_g »

Offline nosuchmember

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Re: ‘That’s my Star’
« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2019, 09:15:31 AM »
‘That’s my star’

I made a wise choice picking you that day,
I made a connection, one that’d stay.
Emphatic, deep rooted, kept me tethered lifelong,
Through shit and through weddings, the voice to my song.

For a time, your riches were lush,
and extremities a rush.
But your leash grew weak;
enemies began to creep.
The drip line was fraying, spiralling, fading...”Oh shit, are we done....?”
You grabbed on and said; “no, you twat, we’ve just fucking begun!”.

I turned and found the army - it was strong,
it was sleek, it was freak; it was there all along.
All standing for you - the best view!
And instead of announcing “I’m God, bow down little you”,
You opened your door and said “come on through”.

hi and welcome to MWC.
Being new here ,I assume, you don't know that children can read the boards.  jt

Offline Lori_g

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Re: ‘That’s my Star’
« Reply #2 on: June 18, 2019, 09:36:24 AM »
Nope, I had no idea. I’ve amended, I hope it’s now appropriate?!

Offline AntonioM

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Re: ‘That’s my Star’
« Reply #3 on: July 09, 2019, 03:21:16 PM »
Hey, a lot of mixed metaphors here, in order to avoid cliche try focusing on one aspect and giving more definition to the subject. The self censoring seems a little inauthentic.

Antonio
ARM