Author Topic: Beau's Moving On Up - 2nd/Final Part of Pilot - (Web Series)  (Read 2642 times)

Offline JDHowell

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Beau's Moving On Up - 2nd/Final Part of Pilot - (Web Series)
« on: March 31, 2016, 08:53:16 AM »
Hello everyone, here's the second/final part of the pilot episode. I hope you enjoy reading and all feedback is welcome.

BEAU
Do you like playing board games? I actually make my own, so--

STEVEN
Dude, you didn't just say that. Board games are so lame.

Steven glances over to Beau, he looks like a saddened child.

STEVEN
You've never tried to be popular, have you?

BEAU
I... Uh... Don't think--

STEVEN
That's a definite no. Let me guess, you're the kind of guy that was off doing homework while the jock was getting a quickie under the bleachers.

BEAU
What I did in my spare time is none of your business.

STEVEN
Tell me, Beau, are you a virgin? Have you ever had a quickie under the bleachers?

BEAU
I don't have to answer that.

STEVEN
That's a definite yes on being a virgin.

BEAU
Not even five minutes here and I'm already being cut down, a new personal record.

STEVEN
I'm not trying to cut you down, I'm trying to help you.

BEAU
Sure doesn't seem like it.

STEVEN
This isn't high school anymore, you've got to get out of your comfort zone, man.

BEAU
I'm out of my comfort zone, I'm far out!

Steven silently stares at Beau.

BEAU
You really think you can help me?

STEVEN
Of course, we're roommates, practically brothers now. Once I'm done with you, you'll be the most popular man on campus, Because let's face it, right now you're like a dried up prune.

BEAU
There we go again with the insults.

STEVEN
Sorry, man. Tell you what, the Frat houses are having parties tonight, you down?

BEAU
Seems a little too extreme for my first night here. I kind of wanna ease into it.

STEVEN
Listen to yourself when you talk. There's gonna be hot girls, lot's of alcohol, and who knows, you might even get that quickie.

BEAU
Does it have to be a quickie?

STEVEN
With the girls around here, you'll get lucky all night long. And a little piece of advice, A freshman with a V-card rarely survives.

INT. FRAT HOUSE - LATER THAT NIGHT

The party is in full swing as Beau and Steven arrive.

STEVEN

Ah, this is what it's all about. We'll stick together tonight, you'll learn the ropes in no time.

BEAU
Stick together, got it.

Beau stays close to the wall, watching everyone else dance to the BLARING music.

STEVEN
Get away from that wall, the women love a good dancer.

Beau looks over at Steven, who is dancing very creepily next to some girl.

Beau moves away from the wall and begins dance. His body is moving all over the place. Steven grabs Beau's arm.

STEVEN
More like this.

Steven moves Beau's arms around in more of a rhythmic motion. Just then Steven SMACKS a stranger with Beau's hand. He quickly steps away, distancing himself from the situation.

STEVEN

Maybe you shouldn't dance.

BEAU
Thanks.

Suddenly, Steven looks at Beau with a wide grin.

STEVEN
Dude, have you ever thought of pledging?

BEAU
Not really, and from what I've seen in movies, I really don't want to.

STEVEN
It's nothing like that, man. Pledging is your number one ticket to popular-vill.

Steven grabs Beau's arm and drags him across the room.

BEAU
Where are we going?

STEVEN
To meet the Frat House President, you're gonna love this guy.

Beau looks up to see a group of guys standing around a table drinking beers and laughing.

One of the guys has his back turned towards Beau and Steven. Steven places his hands on the guy's shoulders.

STEVEN
Hey, Prez, Beau and I would like to pledge this year.

BEAU
(to Steven)
Hey, I never said that.

FRAT HOUSE PRESIDENT
That sounds wonderful.

The Frat House President turns around to reveal himself to be Luke. Luke crushes the beer can in his hand when he sees Beau.

BEAU
Shit.

CUT TO BLACK

hillwalker3000

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Re: Beau's Moving On Up - 2nd/Final Part of Pilot - (Web Series)
« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2016, 09:58:51 AM »
Good cliff-hanger of an ending. Though, being from the UK I have no idea what pledging is (though I can guess it's some weird fraternity initiation ceremony or whatever). Definitely one restricted to the US market I'm guessing.

H3K

Offline JDHowell

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Re: Beau's Moving On Up - 2nd/Final Part of Pilot - (Web Series)
« Reply #2 on: March 31, 2016, 10:16:29 AM »
Thanks Hillwalker, and that's a pretty accurate guess, to be honest.

Offline To a T

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Re: Beau's Moving On Up - 2nd/Final Part of Pilot - (Web Series)
« Reply #3 on: April 29, 2016, 04:48:56 AM »
I don't see these 2 being friends

Your previous development (or my interpretation) was Beau being fine with himself
and 'crystal clear' on what a douche Steven was...

So why? 

Hopefully you will allow your characters to develop beyond this introduction -
and then rethink this intro...
Life isn't always pretty,
but colour won't hurt you

http://tttwritings.blogspot.jp/p/day-one-wild-as-you-are-all-that-love.html

Offline Writer3

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Re: Beau's Moving On Up - 2nd/Final Part of Pilot - (Web Series)
« Reply #4 on: May 28, 2016, 08:38:35 AM »
I agree with To a T. If you want to make Steven become friends with Beau then I think make him less of an ass. I can actually see Beau and Luke being friends more. Possibly they start off disliking each other and then Beau does something and Luke ends up respecting him. This could create a good dynamic and an interesting relationship. You could set up that kind of thing with Steven instead if you want to keep Luke as the antagonist but then I think you should have a different way of them becoming friends than Steven just deciding to be friends with him. It just seems implausible to me. Anyway, that's just my two cents.