Define "something and nothing"

[Jo Bannister]

Derives from Australian sheep stations, where men outnumber women by a significant factor.  Competition is thus so high that holding hands between Bruces and Sheilas is not so much a sign of affection as one of ownership.  Even if there were a couple more out in the bush, a wise Bruce would always try to keep a hand on his bird.

A DOG IS A MAN'S BEST FRIEND

[Amie]

A shocking headline in a small town, when it had previously been reported that said man's wife had left him for his best friend!

CHEATERS NEVER PROSPER

[Jo Bannister]

...And we're back to those widely-believed myths.  Of course cheaters prosper.  It's why they do it.

TIME AND TIDE WAIT FOR NO MAN

[Spell Chick]

This a Timex a detergent piece of propaganda used to persuade women to buy their products.



SHE SELLS SEASHELLS

[Jo Bannister]

Yeah, believe that if you want...most of us reckon she sells something else on the sea-shore!

A FOOL AND HIS MONEY ARE EASILY PARTED

[Spell Chick]

A saying propagated by misers to make them feel better about hoarding money.



TO BE OR NOT TO BE

[Jo Bannister]

That is a question.

FROM HERE TO ETERNITY

[Mark H]

To listen to Der Ring des Nibelungen whilst riding a unicycle down a never-ending corridor plastered with motivational posters.

Bull in a china shop

[Jo Bannister]

Relaxation of the strict Communist agenda in Beijing has led to a resurgence of the traditional religions.  Around 60% of Chinese are Confucians, with 25% Buddhists, and Moslems and Taoists at 5% each.  However, in such a vast country the Pope still has some three million Roman Catholics to care for, and has found that the best way of reaching them is to post an official letter from the Vatican in as many corner shops as he can.

HEAD OVER HEELS

[Mark H]

Position 28 in The Kamasutra.

Crouching tiger hidden dragon.

[Jo Bannister]

Position 29 in the Kamasutra.  (Position 30 is, Lie still and wait for the chiropractor.)

IF WISHES WERE HORSES, BEGGARS WOULD RIDE

[Mark H]

Leon Trotsky's summation of communism. He of course realised that wishes were not horses because there were never any hoofbeats when he blew out the candles.

When the devil is hungry he eats flies.


 

[Jo Bannister]

The devil is a trout!  Who'd have guessed it?

THE DEVIL MAKES WORK FOR IDLE HANDS

[Mark H]

The devil employs youths! Who'd have guessed it?! Everyone actaully.

Kiss me quick.

[Amie]

and then kiss me belly-button, love (command number 43 from the Yorkshire Kama sutra)

ALL MOUTH AND NO TROUSERS