Author Topic: Poem - Toward the North  (Read 1253 times)

Offline CorneliusPoe

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Poem - Toward the North
« on: December 09, 2015, 08:19:02 AM »
This is a season unspent:
there will be snow yet and storms.
Today’s cold recalled
a mere discomfort
and the bite of this wind, but a kiss.

If I prophesy spring
will you pretend to believe me?
We can blanket each other
in warmth for a time.

With the moment eclipsed
by the cold truths of winter,
will you smile me strong
as I frown toward the north?

[I workshopped this here and think it's pretty. Thanks all.]
"Poetry is not speech raised to the level of music, but music brought down to the level of speech." - Paul Valery

Offline Alice, a Country Gal

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Re: Poem - Toward the North
« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2015, 10:49:57 AM »
Like this a lot CP. Had to reread thrice to savor the flavor.
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The universe is made of stories, not of atoms. -Muriel Rukeyser, poet and activist (15 Dec 1913-1980)

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Offline CorneliusPoe

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Re: Poem - Toward the North
« Reply #2 on: December 09, 2015, 02:31:29 PM »
Thanks much, Alice :)
"Poetry is not speech raised to the level of music, but music brought down to the level of speech." - Paul Valery

Offline Demmy

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Re: Poem - Toward the North
« Reply #3 on: March 04, 2016, 07:40:32 PM »
I can relate to this. We had a mild winter to begin with over here and said to myself 'it's not cold yet, it's not cold yet.'

It's cold now! I've had a cough since last week :(

I like this part
Quote
If I prophesy spring
will you pretend to believe me?
.  Just seven months ago it was too hot!

Write on!
'When you write a story, you’re telling yourself the story,’ he said. ‘When you rewrite, your main job is taking out all the things that are not the story.'  Stephen King - On Writing.

While health and strength allow, tolerate work.  For soon come bent old age and silent foot.  Ovid.