Hey! I'm sorry about all the bad constructive criticism you've been getting-I'll give you the most helpful advice I can.
Firstly your formatting is a bit off- you have to use headings which depict whether the location is inside or outside, the actual location and the time of day. As an example, a scene inside a park during the day would be written as:
EXT. PARK-DAY
Make sure it is always in capital letters!
Also, when a character is reading something, you'd use the 'INSERT'. To apply this to your script, instead of writing "Hunter walks the street towards the park, opening the letter. It's a rejection letter for his screenplay", you'd write INSERT: Letter Typed: Rejection of screenplay.
If you'd like to find out more about how to appropriately format your screenplay, you can always find youtube tutorials or some educational content online!
Also, your story must have an interesting premise, and interesting characters. This is easier said than done, of course. What I do to find ideas is to walk around the neighbourhood with a notebook and pen, note down stories, characters, conflicts and dialogue which come to your head. A way of forming a story is by writing a scene, and producing a story around it.
You should also use an appropriate software to write your screenplays. I personally use a website (not software) to write my screenplays. Its completely free and automatically formats your text. Go to
www.celtx.com if you are interested.
Also, read some example screenplays to get a gist of how to write appropriately-some are available for free download here:
http://www.imsdb.com/Finally, just remember to use the correct grammar and punctuation! You wouldn't want your work being textually flawed, as it can make it unmarketable.
Best of wishes! Keep writing!