Author Topic: Return of the Sun Dogs  (Read 4201 times)

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #15 on: December 04, 2014, 12:55:44 PM »
Hi Shadowdrifter,

Nice to see you around again.  That's another vote for deleting themselves.  So that may be the way to go.

As far as the pics, I don't know what's harder to do right - get a sun dog in a picture or in a poem. 8)

Thanks.

T

Offline CorneliusPoe

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #16 on: December 04, 2014, 01:35:57 PM »
Adding a vote against the deletion of "themselves". Your use of "S" sounds is a major contributor to the poem's appeal. The interplay between "themselves" and "sharp" is one of the sonic highlights.

Also the notion of the drifts forming themselves sharp just seems right and makes the image that much more real.

Not looking for a fight, but am most definitely advocating. :)


[ Edited to make sense and look less stupid :) ]
« Last Edit: December 04, 2014, 01:58:40 PM by CorneliusPoe »
"Poetry is not speech raised to the level of music, but music brought down to the level of speech." - Paul Valery

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #17 on: December 04, 2014, 01:41:26 PM »
Cool.  Thanks CP for a return to this. 8)

Offline CorneliusPoe

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #18 on: December 04, 2014, 01:56:35 PM »
Evidently I had 'highlights" stuck in my head. :P I will now edit that reply and pretend that it always made sense.
"Poetry is not speech raised to the level of music, but music brought down to the level of speech." - Paul Valery

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #19 on: December 04, 2014, 02:52:02 PM »
It always made sense to me, and i much appreciate how you have the uncanny ability to see so many of the moving parts of a poem all at one time.  Thanks for your help on this.

T

Offline TOTIBP

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #20 on: December 05, 2014, 07:53:04 PM »
Reading this with a pre-existing fascination of sun dogs made the poem much more enjoyable. Loved the first line. However, I don't think many people are aware of what a sun dog is, so writing poetry on a subject someone is unaware of kinda ruins the poem, but that's not something you can really fix. Anyway, loved it!
Nothing is hard unless you try.

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #21 on: December 05, 2014, 11:04:20 PM »
 I abused the readership here about a year ago with a previous sun dog poem. 8)  You are right, because of wide diversity of participants here at MWC, not that many people are familiar with sun dogs.  Still, its part of my world and that's what I write about.  Glad you enjoyed.

T

Offline heidi52

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #22 on: December 06, 2014, 03:38:59 PM »
writing poetry on a subject someone is unaware of kinda ruins the poem

Surely you aren't suggesting we limit ourselves to only writing poems about things that everyone is aware of? That sounds pretty limiting.  ::)

In the age of google, ignorance is no longer an excuse.

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #23 on: December 06, 2014, 03:56:12 PM »
Good point, Heidi. :)

I took TOTIBP's comment to mean that lack of info can spoil the reader's appreciation of a poem rather than spoiling the poem itself.  And of course you suggest the perfect solution.

This has come up before - how much background info is a writer obligated to try to pack into a poem?  Wiki in iambs?  Maybe that's a poetry challenge in the future.

I'm generally sold on Indar's view that links to information that give some assistance in understanding the poem are entirely proper.  We are in a new age for which we need to fashion new rules and customs that fit today and not the days of King Henry's court.

I ramble.  Maybe this should be taken to Poetic This! if we want to continue.  Or here, I don't care. ::) ::)
« Last Edit: December 06, 2014, 11:42:41 PM by Tom 10 »

Offline TOTIBP

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #24 on: December 06, 2014, 08:25:46 PM »
Yea that's what I meant, reading back I was kinda worried you might take it the other way. stupid words.... being all confusing and stuff. :P
Nothing is hard unless you try.

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Return of the Sun Dogs
« Reply #25 on: December 07, 2014, 10:20:06 AM »
Yea that's what I meant, reading back I was kinda worried you might take it the other way. stupid words.... being all confusing and stuff. :P

No problem, I got what you meant. :)  And thanks again.

T