Author Topic: Poetic This!  (Read 63050 times)

Offline indar

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #510 on: June 04, 2017, 12:34:21 PM »

Tapestries

It's Saturday morning
I'm walking through crowds to the market
fruit and vegetables,
perhaps sausage and beer too.
Sometimes my bones feel that patina of another decade added
in a half-step too low for the familiar curb.
It doesn't worry me,
this exchange of life for time
and the entropy of unwinding days.

My trudging feet are winter-pale,
daring in old leather sandals
at the first hints of summer
that unfolded in the city today.
The street scene is lively, for a moment I wonder
about the population of my neighborhood,
it seems more polyglot
than usual and my imagination rotates,
hesitating between gears. I shrug and keep moving,
a burly fish patrolling the canyons of his reef.

At home, in my apartment, I have student books to review. Today,
I'll set out my work on the dining-room table,
the light there is good
and the silent study can enjoy its weekend illusions. Later,
she'll come through the doorway, her presence familiar, welcome,
a home within a home.
In between our companionable silences,
in (through?) the interaction of inconsequential things,
we weave unconsciously
upon the fabric of marriage, friendship
and yes, the love word too.     


Hi Mark what a lovely ending---the interaction in (I prefer "through") inconsequential things weaves the fabric of a relationship---mmmm-mmm. I went through and put in some extra line breaks because I believe I might be ADHD and shorter lines keep me more inclined to continue reading (that's a joke). But I agree with T the lines are long--perhaps not a negative to T, but it is to me. Nice peek into another's life.

Offline kateD

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #511 on: June 05, 2017, 03:39:25 PM »
This is all great stuff, so WTH is it here? Why not RMP? I venture to this thread about once a quarter.

Love Tapestries, Mark.

Offline Mark T

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #512 on: June 05, 2017, 04:11:10 PM »

Thanks Kate. It's been recycled here after appearing in Napo, just meandering.
Ty, thanks for your thoughts, appreciated.
Thanks for your take, Linda; it feels like every poem I write is experimental in some way. The shorter lines do add something but they also taketh away. The piece was written in the compressed timezone known as Napo, so there may be fuzzy edges. But with this type of non-dense prosy narrative, it just seems to lend itself to the longer lines, for me, anyways. But Ty is right, as a homage, it's off by virtue of the longer lines/stanzas.
With homages, we are supposed to imitate the recipient poet's style. Here, it was more about the poet -  according to my imagination, that is.  ::)
The homage exercise was interesting - it really pushes outside the comfort zone.       

Offline indar

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #513 on: June 05, 2017, 05:37:03 PM »
oh I didn't realize it was written to a prompt. I remember doing that on RMP a long time ago with some impressive results

Offline Mark T

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #514 on: June 06, 2017, 05:06:35 PM »

the prompt was internal only

Offline Mark T

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #515 on: June 16, 2017, 02:07:43 PM »

Some critiquing inspiration - Vogon poetry. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8JJH7ZL_Fk
« Last Edit: June 17, 2017, 10:15:52 AM by Mark T »

Offline Tom 10

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #516 on: November 20, 2017, 04:04:23 PM »
It took me awhile, Mark, but that was pretty good link.


It is amazing what is available on Youtube.


This of course is one of my all-time faves:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDNCEp8Utjo




Offline Tom 10

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #517 on: January 23, 2018, 02:13:28 PM »
Sorry, Mark.


I missed the import of Vogon Poetry when you first posted this.  I am mentally strolling toward the turnip patch as I type this. ;D

Offline Mark T

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Re: Poetic This!
« Reply #518 on: January 26, 2018, 05:18:58 AM »

Tailors go to the turn-up patch. Sorry.