I Smile

[charles89]

I smile
when I come to bed
and the sheets are wrapped
all around
because you insist
the thermostat must be
70 degrees
because you sleep
better in the cold.

[StrangeMercy]

Neat but too short to give much feedback on how to improve this. I would say get rid of the second 'because' and introduce a comma.

Could be meatier but hey ho.
Well done on your first post.

Strange
X

[charles89]

I smile
when I come to bed
and the sheets are wrapped
all around
because you insist
the thermostat must be
70 degrees
since you sleep
better while cold.

[Tom 10]

Cute observation.  We all have a few endearing foibles, its nice to have someone to notice.  Its clear the N. and the blanket thief have this kind of relationship.  You may want to try to snip a few words and retain this feel.

I smile
to see sheets wrapped
around your insistence
of seventy degrees--
you sleep better,
after all, while cold.

Not meaning to mess with your poem, but just to give an example of attempted brevity.  
Thanks for posting.
 
T

[510bhan]

Not sure if I've interpreted this correctly . . . the bed partner is wrapped up against the cold when they sleep better, though they insist the thermometer is 70 degrees [quite balmy -- sunbathing temperature in the UK]

[Tom 10]

Irony, I thought.  No guarantee.

[510bhan]

I thought the N was on a promise because the bed partner was tussling around in the heat -- not sleeping, so hey, why not use the space for some fun?

[Tom 10]

That works

[drab]

I read a wry smile. As in 'I'm not getting any action tonight, again' 
Cute read charles. It's a good sign when people can write poems about simple scenes.
Regards