Author Topic: Raising a Kind Kid  (Read 2605 times)

Offline Sasquatch

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Raising a Kind Kid
« on: November 29, 2012, 09:06:46 PM »
My little daughter goes to a Spanish immersion school. I’m not sure what impact that has on her understanding of the big picture in life, or how it affects her ability to relate to adults, but something about her is truly special. As a parent, of course, I’m quite biased about my child’s attributes, but I’m also a very intuitive and aware person. What definitely stands out about my daughter is the kindness in her heart. When we talk about life, her first concern is how other people feel and how she can help them feel better. I am humbled every time she shows this deep and selfless compassion, particularly when there is an opportunity for her to fall into a materialistic trap. Even when faced with having to give up a toy.

Teaching your children about compassion, about God, and the reason bad things happen, isn’t an easy feat, especially for non-church types. We believe in God, but not in the categorical pious way that some of our neighbors do. The big picture is so complex, and the world so intertwined, there’s just no way I can stomach one story that trumps all else. Without getting too deep into religious discussion, let’s just say our ideology aligns more with Buddhism than anything else. In actuality, when we moved to Georgia, it dawned on me that we might have to face awkward discussions about Jesus or John the Baptist, or the Spanish Inquisition. Although we have had the inevitable run-ins with our next door neighbors (“do ya’ll go to a Baptist church, or…?”), we have had to deal with a much more difficult element which is when Avery brings home statements like “the other kids at school made fun of me because I didn’t know about Jesus…”.

Tiptoeing around your child’s religious upbringing is not something to be done without serious consideration. As a screwed up kid from a pseudo-hybrid Christian household, I want to offer my children a more fair and coherent opportunity at understanding the nature of God.

This evening, we read a parable of a fish asking his father questions about the nature of the sea. The father explained that the sea was all around the fish, inside and out, and that the fish would live and die in the sea. The obvious corollary is the nature of God, and the omnipresence thereof. Avery’s eyes widened when I told her that God was all around her, and when she breathes with awareness, can breath in and out with God. She looked at me with unexpected glee, and took a deep breath as my heart melted and my eyes welled up. The last thing she said to me as I left the room was “Daddy, I am going to just breathe and talk to God tonight until I fall asleep.”

I can’t imagine not sharing this with someone, and thanks for reading it. Whatever your religious convictions, the fundamental underlying thing we can all agree on in this life is that we must treat each other with compassion and respect. There is no other way.


Offline Tom 10

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2012, 03:53:26 PM »
Thanks for posting this.  It was well worth reading.

Offline 510bhan

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #2 on: December 07, 2012, 04:12:39 PM »
You must be so proud. ;) ;) ;)

Offline Sasquatch

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #3 on: December 07, 2012, 05:08:33 PM »
Thanks for the kind words.  :)

Offline bri h

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2012, 07:56:50 PM »
Lovely words and sentiments Sas. I spent the best years of my life being a Dad, I wouldnt trade for anything. I caught my eldest daughter when she was about four or five, sitting in front of the tv one day, and she was picking her nose. I said "Jen, thats not very nice, Ill go get you a handkerchief". I went to the Kitchen to get some kitchen-roll, and when I returned she said, "no need Dad, I put em all back in!" 25 yrs later its still fresh in my memory! b
Fare thee well Skip. We're all 'Keening' now. xbx

Offline Sasquatch

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2012, 08:26:46 PM »
 :D :D

Good stuff bri. Wouldn't change it for anything. My wifey is due to pop any day now, 39 weeks and 1 day pregs. We're expecting a boy this time, Elliott Jon.

Offline bri h

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #6 on: December 07, 2012, 08:39:02 PM »
nice name, I suppose you realise he'll get ej at school? Better than dj(I remember Roseanne!) laf
Fare thee well Skip. We're all 'Keening' now. xbx

Offline DistantSun

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #7 on: December 07, 2012, 09:29:07 PM »
My daughter grasped the concept of others not having as much access to money and necessities (such as food and shelter) around the age of four. Two years in a row she would ask me every other month or so if she could empty her piggy bank and use the money to "help people." I kept dismissing her, redirecting her, thinking she was too young to be contributing to society in that way.

Two years later, she became more insistent to the point where she wouldn't stop until I helped her find someone to help. She decided on her own that it would be food for kids in need. So we counted the coins, her Dad and I added to the total a bit and I followed her around the grocery store as she shopped for her food box from a list she'd grabbed from the Downtown Mission's website.

That was last year. She's decided to make it her own yearly tradition. To say I'm proud of her is an understatement :D

Sasquatch - that's such a beautiful way to explain the concept of God to a little one :D I hope she enjoys retelling the story to her little brother one day ;)
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Offline Alice, a Country Gal

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #8 on: December 07, 2012, 09:33:50 PM »
What a wonderful example to the rest of us. Please give her a hug from me.
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Offline Sasquatch

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #9 on: December 07, 2012, 10:04:43 PM »
DistantSun - Thank you.  :) We're looking forward to meeting the little guy, hopefully this next week. Avery is already foaming at the mouth with anticipation. She's ready to take him under her wing. She suggested just today that once "critter" is born, we should start an organic farm. I'm already growing out my beard.

Sounds like your little daughter is a peach. Goes to show how, when nurtured, the basic humanity within all of us is good and sound. Gives me hope!  :) :) :)

Offline bob68

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #10 on: January 02, 2013, 05:50:52 PM »
Nice read.  :)

Offline kdgrier

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #11 on: January 06, 2013, 10:48:20 AM »
I feel the same way about religion, congrats on raising a kind and open minded child.
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Offline bri h

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #12 on: January 06, 2013, 11:16:29 AM »
hey sas?  Has your wife had the baby yet?
Fare thee well Skip. We're all 'Keening' now. xbx

Offline Sasquatch

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Re: Raising a Kind Kid
« Reply #13 on: January 06, 2013, 03:14:07 PM »
Hey there Brian, thanks for asking. She did indeed, and he's doing quite well. Full head o' black hair and full set o' vocals.

Wifey and Elliott are home from the hospital and we're getting more sleep with each night. My little Avery (age 6) is very happy to be a big sis.

Cheers!