Author Topic: If I Were to Say – What do You See?  (Read 1721 times)

Offline Skip Slocum

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #15 on: December 24, 2011, 10:48:21 PM »
You guys are probably right. Keep it simple. (nodding in the corner.)  ;D

Zubr does sound a bit Si-Fi doesn't it?
« Last Edit: December 24, 2011, 10:57:19 PM by Skip Slocum »
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Sam Cooper

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #16 on: December 25, 2011, 07:32:09 AM »
The thing with description is you have to maintain balance with the story. You have 'thick/shaggy/hide' isn't that enough? Let the reader imagine a bit also, this put them into the story. A bit like describing a character in your story - a reader doesn't need to know every feature, often a charcoal drawing would do and they will fill in the rest.

Offline C.M.

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #17 on: December 25, 2011, 09:54:13 AM »
An aurochs was a wild cow that went extinct in Europe sometime in the middle ages, not sure when. I am confident using the term in the dark ages immediately after the fall of Rome. Off the top of my head, I do not recall seeing the term used in the 13th century, but I put it out there for your consideration.   C.M.
PS, a quick check on Wikipedia says they survived into the 17th century.
« Last Edit: December 25, 2011, 10:01:58 AM by C.M. »

Offline Skip Slocum

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #18 on: December 25, 2011, 01:44:57 PM »
I'm nodding Sam. Give hints and let it go at that.

CM- aurochs, got it. Good lead, thank you. And it appears that back in their day, they lived throughout western Europe.  ;)

I've been trying to maintain a sense of proper placement in naming props. Back at the beginning of my story, I said my character was nibbling on corn bread, til Miss Mary reminded me corn was a 1500's North-American food.  ;D

Thanks guys, and a happy Ho-Ho-Ho to Yule-all  ;D

Skip
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Sam Cooper

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #19 on: December 25, 2011, 04:27:00 PM »
Quote
If I were to say:

          ‘He rolled the thick and shaggy hide of a bull horned deer.’

What do you envision?

I drifted away from what you had originally asked.

I could envision a man rolling a hide, Skip. The bull horned deer, or whatever creature you use, would only help that image if I was familar with the creature, but I'm sure it helps those who do - and sometimes you have to write for those readers also. What I mean is, you don't always have to steer around names. Most times the scene and words around the name have drawn in the image well enough for them to guess - thick and shaggy hide - There's nothing wrong with teaching a reader something new, just don't over-do the lesson because their there to read first.

So I like a species name more, that way you don't have to argue details.

Interesting questions, which made me second think a few things I thought I knew better.

Sam

Offline Skip Slocum

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #20 on: December 25, 2011, 05:09:39 PM »
Do tell.
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Sam Cooper

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #21 on: December 25, 2011, 08:47:05 PM »
Ha, ha :) word limit restrictions would prevent that. Feel lucky that is so. :P

I like to believe every word should suit a purpose in a story, anything else would be fill. But a story needs fill too, or so I'm inclinced more to believe. Often it's the putty of a sentence.

Offline Skip Slocum

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #22 on: December 25, 2011, 09:19:40 PM »
The eloquence of opulent allocution

- "To-morrow is Saint Crispian."
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say, "These wounds I had on Crispin's day."
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember with advantages
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words,
Harry the King, Bedford, and Exeter,
Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester,
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England now a-bed
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin’s Day.” –

Shakespeare – Henery V (act 4 scene 3)

« Last Edit: December 25, 2011, 09:24:19 PM by Skip Slocum »
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Sam Cooper

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Re: If I Were to Say – What do You See?
« Reply #23 on: December 26, 2011, 07:01:41 AM »
ah, if language would not change due to society's influence, it would be so easily mastered. :)