Author Topic: Bank security questions  (Read 3652 times)

Offline Mark H

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Bank security questions
« on: September 04, 2009, 08:53:18 AM »
A stand-up at the Edinburgh Fringe had this routine that I thought would make a good challenge.

So, you know how banks have this security question they ask you when you ring, like: what's you mother's maiden name? Well more and more banks are now allowing their customers to chose their own question and answer. Here's Lucy Porter's:

Bank Question: You are not thinking of going out dressed like that are you?

Customer Answer: You can't tell me what to wear: you're not my dad!

So what would yours be?
Buy Bristle Side Down, The Man Who Wore Brown Shoes and Middleclass Machismo here:
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If poetry is not your thing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PueM04F0Qz8 or: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0Zm8cj9MGg

Offline Gyppo

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2009, 09:43:28 AM »
Bank Question:  "How much would you like me to put in the bag, Sir?"

Answer:  "About quarter of a million in used tens and twenties.  Preferably before I get bored and pull the trigger."
My website is currently having a holiday, but will return like the $6,000,000 man.  Bigger, stronger, etc.

In the meantime, why not take pity on a starving author and visit my book sales page at http://stores.lulu.com/gyppo1

Offline McWawa

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #2 on: September 04, 2009, 05:46:40 PM »

Bank Question: " Would you give the answer to the security question, please? "
Answer: "No sorry, I've forgotten it "

alternative-

Bank Question: " Would you give the answer to the security question, please? "
Answer: "Yes. What was the question again ? "
or

Bank Question: " What was Your mothers maiden name ? "
Answer: "She never married."

"Do you not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed?",
Axel Oxenstierna

Offline Mark H

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2009, 04:24:04 AM »
Bank Question:  "So little boy, would you like to see the size of my bankers bonus?"
Answer:  "Just give me the cash Rupert."

Bank Question:  "Where's Dylan di Vilde?"
Answer:  "I haven't seen him for ages; perhaps he escaped."

Bank Question:  "Would you like fries with that?"
Answer:  "No I just want a new McChequeBook."

« Last Edit: September 05, 2009, 04:27:47 AM by Mark. »
Buy Bristle Side Down, The Man Who Wore Brown Shoes and Middleclass Machismo here:
http://www.lulu.com/shop/search.ep?contributorId=570142

If poetry is not your thing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PueM04F0Qz8 or: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0Zm8cj9MGg

Offline Pearl L.

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #4 on: October 09, 2009, 02:04:02 AM »
Bank Question: Is that your final answer?
Answer: Is that your final question?
Pearl Luke is the author of two novels, <i>Burning Ground</i> & <i>Madame Zee</i>. Please visit http://www.be-a-better-writer.com/ to read excerpts from the novels, and for advice on writing technique and process, writing resources, writing prompts, character name generator, and much more.

Offline Pearl L.

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #5 on: October 21, 2009, 01:17:47 AM »
Question: Why is your investment adviser called a broker?
Answer: On second thought, give me my money back.
Pearl Luke is the author of two novels, <i>Burning Ground</i> & <i>Madame Zee</i>. Please visit http://www.be-a-better-writer.com/ to read excerpts from the novels, and for advice on writing technique and process, writing resources, writing prompts, character name generator, and much more.

Offline Mark H

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #6 on: October 21, 2009, 05:40:40 AM »
Q: What sort of shoes are you wearing?

A: Heh, are you just looking for ideas for Flash Challenge #12?
http://www.mywriterscircle.com/index.php?topic=23748.0

Buy Bristle Side Down, The Man Who Wore Brown Shoes and Middleclass Machismo here:
http://www.lulu.com/shop/search.ep?contributorId=570142

If poetry is not your thing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PueM04F0Qz8 or: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0Zm8cj9MGg

Offline Billy_Bongo

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #7 on: September 26, 2011, 08:20:49 PM »
Bank question; Arr, show me the colour of your insides matey

answer; yo, show me the colour of your green, holmes

Offline DGSquared

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #8 on: October 02, 2011, 04:00:24 AM »
Upon registration...

Q: What color is your toenail polish?

A: Pomegranate Puce

He he, I'm so clever. No one will ever guess that one.

One month later...

Q: What color is your tonenail polish?

A: Can't I just type in my email address and you remind me because I've had my nails done twice since I was last here and it seems I did such a good job picking my answer, I've outwitted myself?
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." -Groucho Marx

A child’s life is like a piece of paper on which every passerby leaves a mark. -Chinese proverb

Blondesplosion! ~Deb

Offline Chrissie

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #9 on: October 02, 2011, 05:12:44 AM »
 ;D Looked at FF#12 and loved the comments about lost time and SCD which reminded me of a joke from long ago which then led me to this bank question:

Question: What's white and slithers across the dance floor?
Answer: Come dancing.

or

Question:What's white and slithers across the dance floor with a whip?
Answer: Strictly come dancing!

Offline Chrissie

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Re: Bank security questions
« Reply #10 on: October 02, 2011, 05:57:45 AM »
Question: Who's Victor Ludorum?
Answer: Dunno, but his wife's called Victrix