Author Topic: tomorrow poem  (Read 1551 times)

Offline traveller

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tomorrow poem
« on: July 08, 2006, 03:41:59 PM »
Iím waiting for tomorrow
Just praying it will come
ĎCause Iím thinking of my Grandad
And afraid his days are done.

Three weeks heís been in hospital
Three weeks heís been in pain
And, though I know itís selfish,
I hope tomorrow comes again.

Most of the days he sleeps now,
Which is a blessing in disguise,
For remembering is difficult,
And it hides the confusion in his eyes.

He barely even knew me
When I found him that long day.
I cried and called my mother
Hoping he would be okay.

I worried for my mother
And for my Grandad too.
Though I had him twenty years
They still seemed all too few.

They called us in the night-time,
Told us to come and say farewell
So that we rushed in to his bedside
And awaited the death-knell.

My hopes for more tomorrows
Were answered on that day.
He held on for tomorrow
And then another day.

When the phone call came again
My selfish heart fell true
I prayed for him to go in peace,
Though our days were far too few.

I ran into the hospital
And straight into his room,
The nurses came and followed me
- too late. Heíd gone too soon.

He didnít wait to say goodbye
Didnít want to see our tears
Better that we remember him
And the good times through the years.

Though my Grandadís gone now-
And for a while our lives were grim-
I have found that tomorrow comes
And that we always think of him.

Offline traveller

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Re: tomorrow poem
« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2006, 03:43:42 PM »
Hi guys
I don't really write a lot of poetry, and the little I write I rarely share.
I wrote this two years ago when my Grandfather died and found it today when sorting through my files.
It's traditional, soppy, emotion-ridden poetry but it's written just for me. I don't know why I've decided to share this piece, I've been logged on here all afternoon and it seemed like the right thing to do for me.
somehow, this says it better.


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Re: tomorrow poem
« Reply #2 on: July 08, 2006, 05:47:57 PM »
I dont think it would be right of me to review on this poem as its been a way of copng for you and also its very personal.   Just perhaps you could check out some of the meter here and there, but its a lovely poem and I wouldnt wish you to change it.


Offline traveller

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Re: tomorrow poem
« Reply #3 on: July 08, 2006, 06:20:14 PM »
Hi Lin,
Thanks for your reply - and thanks for not reviewing this as well! You're right this is probably too personal to be fully reviewed and, though constructive criticism is always welcome, that's not why I submitted it to the site.
Analysing my reasons for posting it I can come up with nothing better than that I just wanted to share it with anyone who could read it and get something - anything - from it.
Take care