Author Topic: The Underbeasts (poem for children)  (Read 12112 times)

Offline Tamara

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #30 on: August 19, 2006, 04:16:25 AM »
I know that I read this poem a little late since you first posted it in January.  It is a wonderful poem and I agree with everyone else that it belongs in a picture book.  I can actually see the two little boys, sitting on their bed having this conversation; wide eyed and secretive.

I do hope you post something to let us all know if you did get it published.

Great work!!

Later
tamara :D
I tap my fingers on the table to the rhythm in my soul
-Keith Urban

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend,
Inside of a dog, it is too dark to read.   
-Grocho Marx

Offline Shina

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #31 on: August 19, 2006, 10:41:18 PM »
Hi Ya Symphony!,
                      ( I had already replied to this yesterday....seemingly unsuccessfully....so if a repeat reply just somehow appears out of the ethos...please excuse it.)

This is a wonderfully delightful poem/story! I LOVE it!!  And as for your question is it too scary for kids... no! Not these days, as I am a Mum of 9.... I can vouch for my troops absolutely Loving it! I see that you posted it on here some months ago...do you now have it published? I hope it will become a book rather than a poem, as kids will love the extra illustrations!

                              Keep up the wonderful work!!
                        Cheers,
                     Shina.
.... At least weasels don't get sucked into jet engines!

Offline rltoon

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #32 on: August 20, 2006, 06:03:26 PM »
Symphony,

This is a brilliant piece and wonderfully constructed! I love the rhyming and poo on anyone who says different! I have three children 13, 7, and 5, and they would absolutely drive me batty if we had this in book form. You know the repetitive nature of kids! Read it again! Read it again! Keep submitting this, someone with some sense in their head will get hold of it and off you go! Good Luck!
Robin :)

Offline wileygrrl

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #33 on: August 21, 2006, 07:28:02 AM »
Symphony. . .

I normally don't read children's stories and can say I have never read a children's poem.  No, No. I can't say that any longer. I read yours and it was beautifully written and i enjoyed it immensly.  I know we writers aren't to use "ly" words but so many appy to your poem.

I have no doubt that, if not already, soon you will be published.  It just felt so good. . . so real.  A powerful piece.

I will look for more of your work.

Oh, by the way, the reason I came to this site was by recommendation by another member, Tamara.  She went on and on about your post so I came to see for myself. Boy, was she right.
Find a career you love and you'll never work a day in your life.

I don't work. I write.
                   Jennifer Elizabeth McDonald

Offline Amie

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #34 on: September 01, 2006, 10:41:52 AM »
I agree with everyone else, this is brilliant.  I'd definitely buy this for my nieces if it were published.  Good luck!
"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet." - Kafka

Offline Big T

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #35 on: September 01, 2006, 12:46:27 PM »
I have just read this! Brilliant wish I'd written it!  ;D
T
Big T  :o

Offline Tyger

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #36 on: September 01, 2006, 02:41:23 PM »
I don't think the author of this poem is on MWC anymore. She has not responded to any of the comments, nor to personal messages.

I guess we lost her to the underbeasts!

Tyger

Offline Big T

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #37 on: September 02, 2006, 12:45:50 AM »
What a shame.
Big T  :o

Telcontar

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #38 on: September 02, 2006, 05:34:28 AM »
Hi Folks,

Symphony left a message in the Coffee Shop on the 20 August; basically she's a bit busy at the moment, but hopes to be back with us in September.

Dave.

Offline Big T

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #39 on: September 02, 2006, 05:53:42 AM »
Hi Dave,
Are you going to tell her it's September already?  :)
T
Big T  :o

nassj

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #40 on: September 04, 2006, 04:03:49 PM »
I loved this,i'm going to read it to my kids it reminds me of the mess they have under their beds.I like the word you used 'underbeasties' and I think a picture book would be great.

Offline Symphony

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #41 on: September 04, 2006, 07:05:46 PM »
Hello there everybody - and apologies for using a generic 'everybody' instead of individual names. I'm absolutely flattered and thrilled and all things wonderful at your comments and suggestions. Can't believe this thread has been dragged up from many months ago and got your attention again - I only wish the publishers thought the same!!!

My apologies also for not being around. I've had a bunch of family troubles and have to say that I'm now currently preparing my mum's funeral for next week, so I'm not quite 'back here' yet, but will get myself sorted soon as, I promise!!

Meanwhile, I had such fantastic hopes for this poem as a picture book, rather than a poem. The response from publishers, however, was that it was too reliant on rhyme! Naturally, I disagree, but I think I'm probably a little bit biased!!!  ::) HOWEVER, The Underbeasts IS currently on a publisher's list in the US. I don't have a release date and I honestly can't even say HOW it's going to be published - whether just as a poem in an anthology or as a picture book, but since I'm only starting out I chose not to be fussy. I need these little boosts to my CV and when I've sold my first prize-winning novel, THEN I'll start getting picky  ;D

I assure you, you'll all be the FIRST to know as soon as I have a date for release of The Underbeasts and I can't tell you how much I truly appreciate your interest, support and suggestions.

Hugs,
Symphony
x

Offline kezzwitch

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #42 on: February 01, 2008, 10:00:08 AM »
Hi I an a newbie today and have just read your poem and ejoyed it immensly. I have been writing poetry for my open university course. I find writing poetry very relaxing, but it always seems to be on the "Pam Ayres" side of things rather than the academic side, which I think gets on my fellow students nerves. Maybe I should post one or two on here and see how it goes.

Thank you so much for the entertainment made me smile. I'm 40 and still don't dangle my feet out the quilt!!

Offline Symphony

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #43 on: February 02, 2008, 08:11:09 AM »
Hi Kezzwitch,

Thanks a million for your comments. Gosh - I'd almost forgotten this poem existed. I wish the publishers and agents around the world were half as complimentary as everybody here. It still gives me hope, although I've had to shelve this one as nobody - anywhere - is remotely interested in this. Some day, when I've money to throw away, I'll enlist my artistic pals and self-publish - and mostly because of all the wonderful feedback from here! So thank you - again!

Symphony
xx

Lin

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Re: The Underbeasts (poem for children)
« Reply #44 on: February 02, 2008, 12:59:56 PM »
When you first posted this one over a year ago I absolutely loved it and still do!!  Its almost like something from Roal Dahl.

I would love to see it published as it is very good!!  You must keep trying.

Hope all is well with you.

All the best

Lin x