Author Topic: Half man half ghost?  (Read 6188 times)

Offline Amie

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #15 on: February 01, 2010, 11:14:48 AM »
Even this reply sounds a bit arrogant  i think?

Not at all - glad you took the most recent comments the way you did :)

re: how you feel about the amputation, that is very interesting. I've read that a lot of our emotion is actually experienced through our bodies, and not just the brain as we might otherwise assume. Which I suppose makes sense if you think about it - most emotion is felt in the body, not the brain - increased heartbeat, sweaty palms, tingling, etc. It is not uncommon for people who have had amputations to report a lower emotional impact than they were expecting, from what I've read.
"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet." - Kafka

Offline Amie

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #16 on: February 01, 2010, 11:16:59 AM »
Tread carefully because you tread upon my dreams?
Stamp heavily because you stamp upon my arrogance
What poem did the top bit come from is what i meant

He wishes for the cloths of heaven - Yeats

But it's 'tread softly', not carefully: http://www.online-literature.com/yeats/776/
"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet." - Kafka

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #17 on: February 01, 2010, 11:20:26 AM »
Tread carefully because you tread upon my dreams?
Stamp heavily because you stamp upon my arrogance
What poem did the top bit come from is what i meant

Ah, I see.

I'm sorry, I wouldn't know.

The Tread carefully because you tread upon my dreams sounds like it comes from a classic poem, rather than something contemporary, and since English isn't my mother tongue, I'm not too well versed in the English Classics. Maybe one of the others can help you here.

Edit: I see Amie already answered that question for you.
« Last Edit: February 01, 2010, 11:22:05 AM by Nelodra »

Offline eric

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #18 on: February 01, 2010, 11:50:59 AM »
Darrell, good job for taking all this on board, you've had some pretty stringent crits, and I agree with you it's the negative ones that can teach you by far the most.  You need to read more -- if you do you'll get better.  Write something you can be proud of, something that will lure Yamrus back, but by all means read.  If you want to write halfway decently, there are no excuses for not doing that.
« Last Edit: February 01, 2010, 11:54:29 AM by eric »

Offline Riri R.

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #19 on: February 01, 2010, 05:47:15 PM »

    and as for my critique of that young girl's statement...it's obvious that i had no idea she was 14...i blindly assume everyone here is an adult.  as such, my critique was out of line.
     john


Um.........................I think I missed something, didn't I? ^^ Oh! But, it's alright, whatever you said, I don't mind it or anything. I don't know, I guess you were talking about the lines in the poem thing? No, yes? Well, whatever it's about, all I know--did know (from Mr, Arko, anyway)--was that you should have at least five words in your poems, so...

When people say, 'You need to have a maximum of...' or 'Have at least...' does that mean you have to actually have that number, or something? I never did get that whole saying-thing.

Man, I'm tired. Oh well. ^^

Lexi
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Offline eric

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #20 on: February 01, 2010, 06:47:00 PM »
Never mind Lexi, don't worry, all is good.  Your work is good.  Just know that Mr. Arko was not even close to right.  There have been no restrictions on line length since forever.  One of the  great poems of the Twentieth Century, for example, is known as The Red Wheelbarrow by William Carlos Williams.  It has no line that is five words long.  

Seamus Heaney, the 1996 winner of the Nobel Prize for Literature and probably the greatest living poet in the world, often writes lines less than five words long.  The greatest translation of Beowulf, the first poem in Old English (by Burton Raffel), has lines that are less than five words long.  Same with Heaney's translation.

Contemporary poets frequently, sometimes consistently, write in lines that are less than five words long.  John Yamrus says the greatest contemporary poet is Milner Place.  He frequently writes in lines that are less that five words long.  John always does.  And I could go on and on.

Very likely Mr. Arko meant to say that poems for whatever purpose he was involved in at the time had to be at least five words long. Otherwise he was just flatly incorrect.

It is a very small matter though, not one to worry about.  Lots of people have opinions about poetry, but not all those opinions are correct.  
« Last Edit: February 01, 2010, 08:30:53 PM by eric »

Offline darrellj

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #21 on: February 01, 2010, 07:24:31 PM »
hi lexi i took you ,meant that a whole poem has to be at least five words
pretend your talking to someone educated in the Penal system,
In fact don't pretend.

Offline eric

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #22 on: February 01, 2010, 07:34:38 PM »
Ah I see she mentioned "certain poems" and "sometimes" so could have been thinking of haiku.  I am pretty sure she meant lines but she was unclear, so I'll look for her answer.

No poems in the world that I know of  have a restriction that they be at least so many words long.  I have written poems that were one letter long and no letters long, respectively.

A poem is a group of  words arranged to evoke an inferential emotional response in the mind and heart of the reader, one that is different from the meanings of the words themselves.  That is the definition of a poem, at least the one I use.  It does not say that a poem needs to be so many words long or set in this or that sort of style.  

Likewise, some people say that only rhyming poems are real ones. Others say there is no way to tell a good poem from a bad one.  Some say you can't define what a poem is.  These notions are just plain wrong, no matter who says them.
« Last Edit: February 01, 2010, 08:06:34 PM by eric »

Offline Riri R.

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #23 on: February 01, 2010, 08:19:13 PM »
hi lexi i took you ,meant that a whole poem has to be at least five words

Oh, no! I didnt mean a whole poem...I just mean lines and whatnot...sorry.

And Mr. Eric? I understand. Also, I like your definiton of poem. ^^
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Offline darrellj

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #24 on: February 02, 2010, 02:00:31 PM »
So would, "perfect poem", be an oxy-moron?
Now i'm really confused.
pretend your talking to someone educated in the Penal system,
In fact don't pretend.

Offline Amie

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Re: Half man half ghost?
« Reply #25 on: February 02, 2010, 02:21:09 PM »
I wouldn't say 'oxymoron' - but I don't see how you can call something perfect when it's subjective. Perfection (it seems to me) can only be ascribed to something quantifiable - otherwise the concept is just hyperbole.
"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet." - Kafka