What you have written is an interesting beginning. I think you do a good job of capturing the feeling of waking up in the morning and being overcome with a flood of ideas before even opening our eyes. I’m interested to read more. I enjoyed the tone and sleepy pace of this piece; it seems appropriate to the moment. I’m no expert, but I’ve written a few suggestions into your text inside ().
Her eyes flutter open in the early hour before the softening of the night-sky in the East announces a new day, (
she is suddenly awake. With consciousness come the familiar flood of racing thoughts that always accompany her awakening. Before her eyes open, she has rejected several thoughts as unpleasant and worry-some. This exercise is a hard won victory of (fruit of her quest instead of victory of her quest?) her latest quest to overcome her downward spiraling, that presses in on her at every turn. (the downward spiraling that presses her at every turn)
This morning, a faded memory emerges, (delete the ,) amid the colorful subjects of her imagination. She turns to her side and sees the dim light of the bright moonlit night, shining softly outside her bedroom window, silhouetting the tall pines on the land. A smile settles on her face softening the lines that have been etched there by so much life. (Smiles usually deepen the lines on our faces – that’s why I’m proud of the lines that are forming at the corners of my eyes – they are the proof of having lived a life full of laughter) This was one of those moments of clarity that come along, not often but always anticipated, after she once experienced the very first. (Not sure I understand this sentence – she once, long ago, had a moment of clarity and now clarity comes along once in a while?)
The realization that the total of life’s experience lies within the subconscious, (delete ,) has lead her to a sense of anticipation, to the hope of a revelation of the essence of self. ‘I will know it in a flash‘, that is the feeling that is crystalized with an unquenchable hope when confusion and emotions are locked into a cycle of fear. (Not sure I understand the previous sentence) This is one of those moment that solicits a smile before opening her eyes, a well feeling, (a feeling of wellness? A contented feeling?) a sense of being vibrantly alive, her subconscious has given up one of her buried treasures...
