Janie,
I'm not going to comment on your dialogue, because if it's a vampire story, the people who are likely to read this will not worry about whether the speech is in period or not. I find it a little modern, but that is often the case even in published historical fiction these days.
Even so, I would like to get it as close as possible, without making it hard to read. Is there a middle ground between what was used then and what I am using?
A widow was expected to mourn her husband for two years, but after a year and a day she could dress in half-mourning. This meant wearing black with coloured trimmings, pinstripes, greys etc. Even Queen Victoria, known for being in mourning for forty years, was only in full mourning for three years.
I knew it was around two years...but I didn't know about the half-mourning, this will give me a chance to describe the clothing. Awesome!
My first thought here is why doesn't she own a riding dress. They didn't ride in everyday dresses, unless they were poor and couldn't afford anything better. You can see some riding dresses here. The elbow length white gloves would only be for evening wear. She would wear leather gloves for riding. Ladies often favoured York Tan gloves, which were a sort of yucky orange-mustard yellow. (regardless of the colour of the dress)
See, this was a part that i was super worried about, I didn't know how she would dress to ride....i had emailed some moderators for a few websites on regency fashions but no one ever replied. Thank you, I will fix it this weekend!
Your typical high-waisted dress, as seen in numerous Jane Austen adaptations, dates this to roughly between 1795-1820. Is that the time period you were aiming for?
Yes... around 1810. I looked up a map for this time period for Devon so that I could kinda picture the ground layout.
Earlier you said her uncle was one of the wealthiest men in the country, therefore it would be unlikely anyone would expect or require her to buy a duck. Actually, estates belonging to moderately rich men would have their own home farm, where chickens and ducks would be bred for the house. An estate was expected to be self-sufficient, and some also supported a town house.
Jane would have struggled to smooth her dress as, in that position, it would be gathered in her lap, with half her legs exposed.
.......
Her mother would not have frowned. She would have thrown a fit. Young ladies did not normally learn to ride astride, although it's common for hoydenish young women in romance novels to do so. If her uncle is wealthy, he would have staff in the stables to saddle her horse. In fact, she would have only needed to lift a finger and the horse would have been brought to the main entrance, saddled, bridled, and with a groom to ride alongside her.
........
At the beginning of the 19th century, a young gentle born woman, riding a horse astride, is equal to wearing stilettos and a mini-skirt, and hanging out on street corners. It doesn't actually prove lack of innocence, but very strongly suggests it. Therefore, the words lacking decorum are a bit of an understatement.
See... this was something I wasn't sure how to express. What happened was that when Jane's father died, she and her mother were taken in by her uncle, but were expected to help run the household (be in charge of the servants mostly). Even though there are people to do these things for her: saddle the horse, buy the duck, etc. She is looking for ways to assert her independence and by going and buying the duck and refusing company on her rides shes doing that. And yes, I am aware of the reputation she will receive, but in my mind that's part of why I love her? But perhaps I'll have her horse saddled for her and write a dialogue about her refusing the company of a groom.
If you can't imagine how one of the wealthiest people in the country lived, you might find it easier to lower the status of the uncle. Besides, a poorer uncle would be more likely to want to sell her off to the highest bidder than a rich one.
True... I probably should, but I don't want him to be too poor because there are certain things I want Jane to be able to have/experience. Once again is there a middle ground?
The status of Ezekiel is unclear, but if he's been working in the stables - particularly in an unofficial capacity - then why would one of England's richest men allow him to court his niece?
See this is what Ezekiel is worried about, that he won't be allowed to court her. And really, he isn't poor, but he isn't as well off as Jane, though if i lower her uncle's status perhaps they will be equal. The only reason he helps out in the stables is to have a reason to be closer to her. The type of girl I am making her into would be more interested in the type of quite hard worker than one who was very obviously well off and made a point to act as such? does that make sense?
A single man could not ask a single young woman to accompany him to a party. He would have to hope that she received an invitation, and that her mother accepted it, which seems unlikely considering she's still mourning her husband. Invitations could be accepted while in half mourning, but you've already set the mother up as still being upset over her husband's death, which would seem to preclude the idea of her going out partying.
Even if Ezekiel and Jane were betrothed, they still wouldn't be allowed to go to a party as a couple.
Hmm... I didn't know about the mother accepting the invitation. Could she not go without her mother? And I'll change the set up i have about how Ezekiel is looking at the party. I guess I need to word it better. I wasn't really expecting them to go together, more so that they would just be at the same party and he would have a chance to speak with her, and perhaps dance.
Thank you so much for everything. I'll try to figure some of this out this weekend when i get the chance to write.
