Author Topic: The Castle (Part 2)  (Read 3507 times)

davidleejones13

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The Castle (Part 2)
« on: April 21, 2008, 12:11:40 PM »
As Angela entered the dusty main hallway, a jingling sound came to her ears reminding her of her pet cat's collar. She dismissed this as possibly a neighbor's pet hanging out somewhere around or within the house. For a moment the musty smell of the inside overwhelmed her, but she quickly became accustomed to it and began to explore.

The main hallway led to a set of double stairs that started from opposite sides of the entrance's foyer, sweeping elegantly up to meet one another at the top floor. A dusty chandelier, laden with countless cobwebs, hung from the center of the ceiling missing several pieces of crystal. The stairways railings were missing several spindles giving the impression of an upside down grin missing several teeth.

At the top of the stairs two large ornate doors stood ajar revealing the master suite beyond. Angela decided this was the room she would stay in and made her way carefully up the stairs to drop off her belongings.

Again, as she ascended the steps, she heard tinkling bells coming from down below. She laid out her sleeping bag and placed her journal and the flashlight on top after smoothing it out upon the dusty floor. Her eyes were drawn to a patch of wall where the stained heavy wall paper had peeled away. Behind the faded dry paper there was a name and message scratched roughly into the brittle stucco of the wall.

Lewis Hillard Kelly
50th PA. Regiment, CO. G
1864


She quickly scrawled the name down in her journal for later study. Angela decided, while there was still an hour of light left, she would explore the grounds before settling in for the night.

Minutes later she found herself outside and below the kitchen window. There, on the ground below the window a giant "dead" spot lay within the bushes and the overgrown grass. Angela was idly wondering why nothing grew in the spot when her thoughts were interrupted by the jingling of small bells once again.

Another gust of chill wind sent hair flying into her face. Angela pulled a rubber band from her pocket and, while tying her hair back behind her head, she spied something reflecting dusky sunlight from the lower branch of a gnarled oak tree in the back yard and near the rivers edge.

She made her way over to the tree and squinted against the sun's low angled setting rays. Angela  made out the silhouette of what appeared to be a pocket watch.

"This is an odd place for you," she said as if it could understand her. Angela had to stand on her tiptoes but, after about three tries, she got a grip on the watch. The metal was cold to the touch as she yanked on the timepiece. The chain stubbornly held onto the branch for a few minutes until she finally wrenched it free.

"Must be my lucky day," she said turning it over in her hands. Suddenly she heard children's laughter coming from one of the arched entrances to the basement. She shoved the watch into her pocket and made her way over to the open entrance.

"Hello?" She poked her head inside the dark entrance, "Is there anyone there?"

The question was answered with tinkling bells, the sound of which was starting to fray on her nerves a bit. She decided to investigate surmising the bells must be some type of annoying wind chime or something of this nature that hung in the basement. Her only impulse now was to silence them.

A single shaft of red sunlight shone on a far wall entering through a small broken window. Angela could see drawings in red and blue crayon. She made her way over to investigate. The drawings appeared to be by two different people judging by varying degrees of talent in the artwork. Everything that was drawn with the red crayon was simple but neat, as if drawn by a child. The blue crayon was more haphazard. It appeared the artist bared down too hard and there were several smudges throughout the blue artwork.

Near the middle Angela read four lines that were written within the collage of  artwork.

WHAT IS YOUR NAME? Written in the pretty child's handwriting.

GRENAUCHE. Was the roughly scrawled reply in blue. WHAT IS YOURS?

EMILY. Was written in red with a smiley face drawn after the "y."

Angela smiled as she looked at the artwork. At the base of the wall she saw a small little doll half buried in the dirt. She uncovered it and brushed it off. It was roughly stitched having two red buttons for eyes, and faded orange yarn for hair. The swatch of flowered fabric of it's dress was tattered and torn and it was only as big as the palm of Angela's hand.
As she gently sat the doll at the base of the wall she noticed a worn green crayon half buried in the sand. She dug it out and upon the wall under the writing she wrote.

MY NAME IS ANGELA, putting her own smiley face at the end.

A sudden chill ran down her spine. The air around her suddenly seemed heavy and an acrid smell came to her nostrils. The temperature within the basement dropped twenty degrees and she swore she felt a presence. She hastily got up and ran for the exit.

As she reached the twilight outside the bells came to her ears again as she looked back at the wall, still barely visible in the fading light. The art work was now gone. Goose pimples sprouted upon her skin as she read the writing there in blue and red crayon each adorned with a smiley face of it's own.

HELLO ANGELA
NICE TO MEET YOU ANGELA

« Last Edit: April 22, 2008, 02:02:36 AM by davidleejones13 »

Offline dedelite

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #1 on: April 21, 2008, 04:27:18 PM »
I have written on several boards to get you a message. Hopefully this one works. Or if you get them all then, oh well.
This is good. I loved reading it. I love all your stories because I like the flow you follow in your writing. One small thing: creek is a water hole, creak makes the noise.
Have you decided on what your going to take moretime with. You have your choice  all of them are good enough to keep going. I really like this one.

dedelite

P.S. When I try to write you at Red VAmpire I always get it back to me. or I get a response meant for you from someone else.

midnightcandle

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #2 on: April 21, 2008, 04:35:18 PM »
Brrrrrrrrrrr. Is it cold in here? Scary stuff mate :o

davidleejones13

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2008, 06:19:34 PM »
Hey Midnight,
Thanks. It will get even more scary before the end. Wait until after sunset!
Muhahahahaha! That is when the fun stuff starts. ;D

Dedelite,
I have had problems with that blog. I had originally had it set up where I could only post. Whenever anyone posts on that site it automatically sends it out to everyone on the blog. Sorry about that!
I am glad you like my writing, you always have kind comments. I have been convinced to pick up the Wizard War, but this tale here has me nailed down until I finish it. I have the outline in my head and I cannot expand on anything else right now. I hope that it turns out to be worth it :-\

Thank Yall for reading my work!

Lee

midnightcandle

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #4 on: April 21, 2008, 06:32:34 PM »
No probs dude ;D

davidleejones13

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #5 on: April 22, 2008, 01:48:12 AM »
Thanks Dedelite,
for catching the typo. I just caught it in your comment...going to change it right now...
Part three will be up in the next few days.

Thanks for keeping me straight! ;D

Lee

Offline SteveJ

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #6 on: April 23, 2008, 06:32:18 AM »
This is becoming intriguing now...
When are you posting Part 3, Lee? :)
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Offline ma100

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #7 on: April 23, 2008, 07:12:26 AM »
Glad I wasn't a kid with you Lee.
I would never have slept if you
told me about this.
Mairi :)

davidleejones13

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #8 on: April 23, 2008, 11:32:19 AM »
Ma,
Childhood around here could garner some stories by itself. Like the time the neighborhood bully was bugging us and as we ran from him he was riding his bike down the hill with no hands. That is because he was flipping us off with both of them. At the bottom of the hill he ran into his own fathers car who was called home early because the school called about....guess who, his bully son. The conversation had to take place at the HOSPITAL, and the damage to the car costed about as much as the damage to the child. His Karma got run over by Dads Dogma. ;D
As always, Thank you for reading.

Steve,
You are feeling the setup aren't ya? I have not been able to get to part three, although it is still fresh in my head. I have done more research which inspired a few more ideas. I do not want to make it overly long so I am weighing what ideas I want to use, and which ones I want to scrap. I found a killer photo of the house from the early 1900's.


If you look in the lower right arch coming out of the basement, you will see a figure there. It was probably just a kid playing underneat the house...but in my story; It is Grenauche! Thank you Steve for reading. Next segment is going to go one of two ways, one more scarier than the other. The less scary way though will provide more backgound to make the story better....see, I have got choices on this one.

Lee

Offline Ninny

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #9 on: April 23, 2008, 12:19:50 PM »
Well!  David, I'm chilled to the bone.  This is truly brilliant.  Honestly, words fail me.  It's scary and yet so beautiful.  I don't want to gush...but...I love it, love it, love it.  Hurry up and give us some more.  Many thanks

Rowena
Okay!  You got me,,I'm here to socialise!!

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davidleejones13

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #10 on: April 23, 2008, 12:33:35 PM »
Rowena,
Thank you so much for the enthusiastic comment. I am thrilled you love it. Part three is coming soon, I promise. This is the kind of comment that makes me wanna call in sick to work so I can bang out the next part immediately. But, alas, life calls.
Thanks again Rowena for reading...I won't make you wait too long for the next part ;D

Lee

Offline SteveJ

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #11 on: April 23, 2008, 12:41:36 PM »
Yesssss, get writing, Mr J!  *cracks whip*  ;D ;D ;D
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davidleejones13

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Re: The Castle (Part 2)
« Reply #12 on: April 23, 2008, 12:56:22 PM »
Why do I suddenly hear DEVO playing in the background?
I have to go to work yall...when I get home in the wee hours I will get to cracking.
Promise.

Lee ;D