Author Topic: Fear of flying  (Read 6500 times)

Offline TristanNewsome

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Re: Fear of flying
« Reply #45 on: May 20, 2008, 02:04:18 AM »
I used to hate flying! I got over it (initially with copius amounts of booze!) by thinking - whats the worst that can happen?: You crash and die - aint much you can do about it!

I'm totally cool with it now. I think once you've flown a few times you just get used to it and then bored with it. The funniest thing i heard was when a stewardess (during severe turbulence) calmy announced "we're experiencing some slight (i laughed out loud at this one) turbulence, just think of it as driving over a bumpy road" Yeh right a bumpy road 20000 feet in the air that has nothing between the car and the ground....

Think of the fun you'll have when you get used to it! My fave is to sit next to the obviously scared person (white knuckles and the sweats on a cold plane) and everytime the plane bumps or makes a funny noise grasp their hand and whisper shakily "is that normal?" hours of fun!!

Good luck :)
God tried to get me on his side, somewhere between his first and last lie

Offline Xerika

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Re: Fear of flying
« Reply #46 on: May 21, 2008, 06:35:19 PM »
Anyway, I'm very glad that you made it, Xerika! How was the trip? And the two million dollar question: are you going to do it again?  ;D ;D

Thanks, Louie. The flights both ways were quite smooth so I was lucky in that respect. One of the hardest parts was doing without a cigarette for all that time.  :) Would I do it again? Well, I'm not eager but if it has to be done, it has to be done.

Hi Tristan. Not sure I'll ever have 'fun' flying, and I just hope I never end up sitting next to you on a plane.  ;D
http://rob-johnson.org.uk/ - writing, podcasting and reluctant olive farming

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Offline Gyppo

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Re: Fear of flying
« Reply #47 on: June 26, 2008, 02:14:08 PM »
Tristan, you're evil.  But if you embrace the 'dark side' your powers will be even greater.

If you want to aspire to Jedi level 'in flight evil' start collecting unused sick bag whenever you fly.

One simple trick is to cut the bottom open at home, and then swap it for one on the plane.  But you may not get to see the results.

If you want to actively encourage the results then you move onto technique two.  The Colslaw in a sick bag trick.   Use coleslaw with plenty of carrot.  Take it on board with you, and at some bumpy point in the ride pretend to be sick into the part-filled bag.  That alone can be quite effective if you get the sound effects right.

Lean back in your seat, looking ill, then open the bag and peer inside.  Your immediate neighbours will think you're mad.  But not as mad as when you take a plastic spoon from your top pocket and start eating the coleslaw.  "Mmm.  Tastes nearly as good as the first time down."

If that doesn't make them reach for their own bags - hopefullly including the one with the open bottom - there is still one move left to make.

Scoop out a dripping spoon of coleslaw and offer it to your neighbour...  "Would you like some?"

You'll probably never be allowed to fly with that particular airline again ;-)

Gyppo
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Offline Xerika

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Re: Fear of flying
« Reply #48 on: June 26, 2008, 07:13:51 PM »
Jeez, Gyppo, I had to reach for a bag halfway through reading that post.

Note to self:

If you are ever stupid enough to fly again, probably not a good idea to sit next to any member of MWC as they clearly have an overly developed (and often warped) imagination.  ;D
http://rob-johnson.org.uk/ - writing, podcasting and reluctant olive farming

"I'd Rather Eat My Own Face" podcast. The truth about olive harvesting. http://wp.me/p2bC2C-8U

"If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it." - Elmore Leonard

Offline Gyppo

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Re: Fear of flying
« Reply #49 on: June 26, 2008, 08:13:50 PM »
In truth only an idiot encourages the person next to him to be sick.

Someone across the aisle is a better choice.


Gyppo
My website is currently having a holiday, but will return like the $6,000,000 man.  Bigger, stronger, etc.

In the meantime, why not take pity on a starving author and visit my book sales page at http://stores.lulu.com/gyppo1

Offline Xerika

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Re: Fear of flying
« Reply #50 on: June 26, 2008, 08:24:10 PM »
Note to self:

Just try to avoid getting on planes. If this situation is inevitable, ensure that absolutely no-one onbiard is an MWC member.
http://rob-johnson.org.uk/ - writing, podcasting and reluctant olive farming

"I'd Rather Eat My Own Face" podcast. The truth about olive harvesting. http://wp.me/p2bC2C-8U

"If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it." - Elmore Leonard