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Review My Script / Give me feedback please. This is the beginning of the script.
« on: December 20, 2017, 09:54:02 PM »
FADE IN:
EXT. SECRET AIR FORCE BASE - NIGHT
A man in a uniform leans against a wall,
next to a door. Face clouded by cigarette
smoke.
He checks his watch, flicks the cigarette
onto the pavement, extinguishes with his
boot.
He turns to open the door to his right,
walks in.
INT. SECRET AIR FORCE BASE - SAME
The cold stern man, SERGEANT MORGAN (40's),
with an enormous scar across his face, walks
along the corridor.
Morgan approaches a guarded door where an
officer stands in front of. He nods to the guard,
the guard opens the door.
Morgan walks into --
THE SURVEILLANCE ROOM
Morgan's commander, a cold looking man,
JOHN (50's), talks to a few surveillance
workers, then walks over to greet Morgan.
JOHN
(Shakes his hand)
Morgan.
MORGAN
Sir.
JOHN
I guess you're wondering
why we called you here.
MORGAN
It crossed my mind.
JOHN
Follow me. There's
something I need to show
you.
They walk toward a screen monitor.
JOHN (CONT'D)
You're the best negotiator
we've ever had.
They approach the monitor and MORGAN sees a
weird, skinny arm twitch on the screen.
JOHN (CONT'D)
We need you to ask these
things a few questions.
MORGAN
What are they?
JOHN
Aliens... But we call
them Ellipticans due to
the shape of their heads.
MORGAN
Why are they here?
John hands him a sheet of paper.
JOHN
That's why you're here.
To ask them these
questions.
Morgans eyes dart as he considers this.
JOHN (CONT'D)
No one has attempted to
do this. So get your ass
in there and get it done.
He nods to John. A nod that says: "Yes, sir."
Morgan turns, walks toward a door, opens it and
goes into --
THE INTERROGATION ROOM
Morgan walks in, shuts the door behind him.
He lays the paper that John gave him on the
metal table, then sits down across from the
ELLIPTICANS.
The two aliens, with small slinder bodies,
oval-shaped heads, no mouths and vast grey
eyes, sit in restraints.
Morgan gazes at them. Not intimidated.
He then studies the list of questions, looks
up and asks:
MORGAN
Where are you from?
Nothing. Pure silence.
MORGAN (CONT'D)
Why are you here?
Morgan hears a trembling noise as their eye
color change from grey, to a deep bright
purple.
He yells at the top of his lungs in agony.
Then SLAMS his hands against the sides
of the table while tears stream down his
face.
He then becomes calm, starts to speak,
but it's not really him talking. It's the aliens
talking through him.
MORGAN
We're looking for
someone... One of us
among you.
INT. AUTO REPAIR SHOP - NIGHT
A car hood CREAKS as it opens.
A young handsome man (28), TYLER, works on
a 65' Ford Mustang.
EXT. SECRET AIR FORCE BASE - NIGHT
A man in a uniform leans against a wall,
next to a door. Face clouded by cigarette
smoke.
He checks his watch, flicks the cigarette
onto the pavement, extinguishes with his
boot.
He turns to open the door to his right,
walks in.
INT. SECRET AIR FORCE BASE - SAME
The cold stern man, SERGEANT MORGAN (40's),
with an enormous scar across his face, walks
along the corridor.
Morgan approaches a guarded door where an
officer stands in front of. He nods to the guard,
the guard opens the door.
Morgan walks into --
THE SURVEILLANCE ROOM
Morgan's commander, a cold looking man,
JOHN (50's), talks to a few surveillance
workers, then walks over to greet Morgan.
JOHN
(Shakes his hand)
Morgan.
MORGAN
Sir.
JOHN
I guess you're wondering
why we called you here.
MORGAN
It crossed my mind.
JOHN
Follow me. There's
something I need to show
you.
They walk toward a screen monitor.
JOHN (CONT'D)
You're the best negotiator
we've ever had.
They approach the monitor and MORGAN sees a
weird, skinny arm twitch on the screen.
JOHN (CONT'D)
We need you to ask these
things a few questions.
MORGAN
What are they?
JOHN
Aliens... But we call
them Ellipticans due to
the shape of their heads.
MORGAN
Why are they here?
John hands him a sheet of paper.
JOHN
That's why you're here.
To ask them these
questions.
Morgans eyes dart as he considers this.
JOHN (CONT'D)
No one has attempted to
do this. So get your ass
in there and get it done.
He nods to John. A nod that says: "Yes, sir."
Morgan turns, walks toward a door, opens it and
goes into --
THE INTERROGATION ROOM
Morgan walks in, shuts the door behind him.
He lays the paper that John gave him on the
metal table, then sits down across from the
ELLIPTICANS.
The two aliens, with small slinder bodies,
oval-shaped heads, no mouths and vast grey
eyes, sit in restraints.
Morgan gazes at them. Not intimidated.
He then studies the list of questions, looks
up and asks:
MORGAN
Where are you from?
Nothing. Pure silence.
MORGAN (CONT'D)
Why are you here?
Morgan hears a trembling noise as their eye
color change from grey, to a deep bright
purple.
He yells at the top of his lungs in agony.
Then SLAMS his hands against the sides
of the table while tears stream down his
face.
He then becomes calm, starts to speak,
but it's not really him talking. It's the aliens
talking through him.
MORGAN
We're looking for
someone... One of us
among you.
INT. AUTO REPAIR SHOP - NIGHT
A car hood CREAKS as it opens.
A young handsome man (28), TYLER, works on
a 65' Ford Mustang.