My Writers Circle

Poets Corner => Review My Poetry => Topic started by: indar on April 10, 2012, 06:31:27 PM

Title: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 10, 2012, 06:31:27 PM

http://rinabeana.com/poemoftheday/index.php/category/gary-larson/

Sea Poetry

Rolling roaring flattens
into foaming whispers.
Pipers run in and out
advance, retreat.
Sea cajoles and teases
sand from
beneath my feet:
come in, come in
but even now
shadows lurk.
Damn that Spielburg,
Damn that Spielburg.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: Tom 10 on April 11, 2012, 07:36:30 AM

Very enjoyable retake, I got the feel of waves in and out.  Love the humor.

T

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: 510bhan on April 11, 2012, 07:45:05 AM

Sea Poetry -- for Titanic week

Rolling roaring flattens
into foaming whispers.
Alarms sound here and there
advance, retreat.
Sea cajoles and teases
lifeboats from
beneath my feet:
come in, come in
but even now
shadows lurk.
Damn that iceberg,
Damn that iceberg.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: Tom 10 on April 11, 2012, 08:02:46 AM

Ha!  Good one!

T

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 11, 2012, 09:20:11 AM

That's dark, Sio. Thanks Tracy :)

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: Tom 10 on April 11, 2012, 09:39:45 AM

      Sea Poetry - for Supper

Rolling roaring fattening
foaming rolls of dipping sauce
Waiters run in and out
forks advance, withdraw
lobster cajoles and teases
boatloads
past my jaw.
come in, come in
but even now
regrets lurk.
Damn the calories,
Damn the calories.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: 510bhan on April 11, 2012, 09:41:55 AM

See how inspirational you/your poems are indar? ;D

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 11, 2012, 10:04:24 AM

Blame Gary Larson ;D

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 11, 2012, 11:14:20 AM

Tracy,
You have very cleverly written a poem that fits 2 categories here: Sea and restaurant. Good job.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: SparkyDashforth on April 11, 2012, 01:16:03 PM

Fun, creative stuff guys!
Good-un Indar.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 11, 2012, 01:21:05 PM

Thanks Sparkey,
I have these ideas for serious writing but
a silly streak has overtaken me lately.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: Mark H on April 11, 2012, 01:44:46 PM

Distant Girls

The distant girls call to me.
Their rolling hips seduce my heart.
Oh, how I want to graze in their lush valleys.
Oh, how I want to cum on their milky slopes.
Alas, I cannot.
Damn the restraining order!
Damn the restraining order!

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 11, 2012, 10:01:26 PM

An intense discourse on a uniquely human drama, excellent writing.

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: DocPoet on April 11, 2012, 10:14:24 PM

This is funny. An interesting way of describing the ocean, then a Jaws reference (sorry, love that movie tho!).

I think it's spelled cajoles.

I have no nits. I always like humor in poetry.

Jake

Title: Re: Sea Poetry (curse words)
Post by: indar on April 12, 2012, 01:04:53 AM

Quote

a Jaws reference (sorry, love that movie tho!).

Gripping. :o

thanks Jake.