My Writers Circle

The Coffee Shop => The Gallery => Topic started by: Words tu Die pour on December 30, 2008, 04:24:06 PM

Title: wondereous form
Post by: Words tu Die pour on December 30, 2008, 04:24:06 PM
I lay smitten, as I watch the dim light
Leap from strand to strand in your hair.
The fading fragrance cups my head
As I slowly close in to catch distant remnants.

Your body rests wrapped in arms as your
Head sits idle, just listening, listening to
The growing song my heart plays for you.
No sweeter composition composed.

Such a prudent prestige, while hearts
Beat Fickle in decisions of timeless truths.
In the times you feel so all alone,
I hear you call my name.

When seclusion sets us apart, I pray,
To knees I fall, itís me youíre thinking of.
As darkness falls all around, I indulge
In thoughts of harmony plucked from
Heart and souls tether.
Title: Re: wondereous form
Post by: good_stuff on January 01, 2009, 10:26:31 PM
That is a wonderful poem  :) Although you should really post poems in the other forums, just above this one.  ;)
Title: Re: wondereous form
Post by: Chaucer on January 02, 2009, 12:11:37 AM
Wow!  Speechless........ :)

This is beautiful.  Really lovely.

I like your use of alliteration in here........sometimes too much alliteration bothers me, but yours is just perfect.  I'm a newbie and an amateur,  so this is just my opinion, but I LOVE IT!

How you use the senses in your words........okay I could go on and on here.  Nice job.  Excellent, well done!  I think you should find a contest to enter this in or try to get it published somewhere.

Take care.  Think I'll read this poem again and again.

wondereous?  wondrous?  wonderous? Just wondering myself.... ;)